Coco is So Classy.

The epitome of class, Coco showed up to the Children Uniting Nations Oscar party looking like a sweet classy sophisticated lady. That outfit is so chic, I'm sure Valentino will come out of retirement to make a collection inspired by it. She'll be his muse.

I hope you can smell the sarcasm, because I'm not sure I can lay it on any thicker.

Anyway, at least her nipples are covered.

What.

You're probably thinking to yourself, "who is this vision of glamour?"

Well bitches, it's none other than Joan Van Ark, best known for her role on Knots Landing.

Joanie worked the red carpet last night with full-on botox face.

xoxo
Nicole

Photo: Perez

Rebecca Miller Busts Out The Fug For Oscar Night

Daniel Day-Lewis's wife Rebecca looked ten shades of fug last night.

I really have nothing more to say, this look speaks for itself.

Photo: Dlisted

Is It Just Me or Does Tilda Look Like a Lemur?

"Blah blah Tilda was amazing in Narnia blah blah blah........"

Tilda is a lemur bitches. Get over it.

This woman is so creepy and white and her eyes remind me of Brit after some Purple Drank.

Gross.

Congrats though Tild. You work that lemur vibe.

xoxo
Nicole

Helen Mirren Looks Good, Actually.

Helen looks pretty fierce in this outfit. I don't give two shits if you don't like it, she is really working this red with jeweled sleeves.

Usually she looks old as hell to me, but tonight she looks good.

Ah whatevs, she'll always be The Queen to me.

xoxo

Nicole

Photo: AP

DIABLO CODY WINS BEST ORIGINAL SCREENPLAY OSCAR!

In all seriousness, it is amazing that Diablo won an Oscar tonight. I know I poked fun at her earlier, but I really have alot of respect for a person who can be so fearless in following their dreams and living exactly they way they want to. I honestly try to do that everyday.

Plus, she is the epitome of Trashbag Chic. I love her.

Kisses Diablo, and Congraulations from your fans in the MSP!

xoxo
Nicole

Am I the Only One Annoyed By the Oscar Sing-Along Performances?

So far this evening Amy Adams, Kirsten Chenoweth, and some child with a choir have had performances on one of the ONLY MAJOR AWARDS SHOWS THAT HAS HAPPENED THIS SEASON.

Where is Xtina with her giant chi-chis? Where is Beyonce butchering classing musical theater songs? Not even Jordan Sparks or some other equally C list American Idol singer is on hand to sing?!?!

What in the hell.

Diablo Cody is Amazing

Diablo Cody is the hot piece from the Minneap who wrote JUNO.

First of all, I love that movie.

Second of all, I love that she is a reformed stripper.

Third of all, I love that she wore leopard to the Oscars. Represent for all us tacky divas in MSP Diablo! We love you!

Also, incase you didn't know, there was major dramz about what shoes she was going to wear. Shoe making bitch Stewart Weitzman made some million dollar shoes and stated that Diablo would wear them to the Oscars. Well, no dice Stewie. Apparently Diablo felt this was a "publicity stunt" and that no one asked her if she would wear them. So, the glamour that is Diablo probably went to Rainbow and got these $15.00 ballet flats instead. Love her.

xoxo

Nicole

Photo: Dlisted

Girls Just Wanna Have Fun

Here is my favorite old queen on the carpet tonight!!! The hair looks BETTER but the makeup is FUG.

I admit it. I watched WILD HOGS with Queen Johnny today. It was hysterical watching his ass on a motorcycle.

xoxo

Nicole

Photo: Dlisted